Batman: The Dark Knobhead

It’s midnight. The good citizens of Petoskey, Michigan are sleeping. The only signs of life are cats stealing scraps from local restaurant’s trash cans, mice collecting bedding and…a thirty-something year old twit dressed as a superhero perched on a ledge of a hardware store.

This may read like a work of fiction but this is exactly what happened in Petoskey back in May of this year. Mark Williams, a 31-year old self confessed “comic book geek”, donned a homemade Batman costume and took to the streets of his Michigan hometown. During his reconnaissance work he climbed onto the roof of a hardware store. Police were alerted to this when Williams was spotted hanging off one of it’s ledges. Officers from Petoskey’s Department of Public Safety were soon at the scene and attempted to coax the Batman-wannabe back to safety. However, Williams refused and the police were forced to drag him back onto the roof. In searching his “utility belt”, they discovered he was in possession of pepper spray and a collapsible baton. He was then arrested for possession of dangerous weapons, resisting an officer and trespassing.

Wow! What a fun-filled night Mr. Williams had. As a kid I used to love pretending to be fictional characters. As a wee nipper I used to love acting out scenes from “He-Man and the Masters of the Universe”. When I got a little older pro-wrestling was my poison of choice. But now, at 32, you’re probably unlikely to find me dressing up like an idiot (besides my recent Womanless Beauty Pageant of course).So what possessed this guy to act in such a manner? Your guess is as good as mine. If he was auditioning for a place in the “Rain City Superhero Movement” I’m guessing he probably flunked it.

The only thing I can deduce from his picture (taken at the local police station) is that his underarm Bat-deoderant failed him. Sad.


5 comments on “Batman: The Dark Knobhead

  1. In defense of Mark, there isn’t a lot to do in Petoskey. They did have the 51st Morel Mushroom Festival in May, and a Day-Away trip to Chicago, “Girls Just Wanna Crop” scrapbook festival, 3rd annual Indian River Walleye Tournament, and the Grateful Dog Walk and Run, but apparently on the night in question, the town’s only hooker was having her hair done and there was absolutely nothing on TV.

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